Some days, more often than not, you feel like you’re going forwards and backwards – all at the same time.

Some days though, it’s just freedom, just quiet – just chuffed and full of joy.

Sitting, feet out on the railing, a storm in the distance rumbling, subtle noise to be heard overhead from people having fun, nothing to see out in front of me other than the ocean, and just a calm and serene environment.

But I was on the hunt – the hunt for the great Pineapple.

Before we left on the cruise, I’d seen the TikTok’s, I’d read the Reddit posts, I’d watch the YouTube videos, and I was obsessed – not about being a part of the “pineapple lifestyle,” but that this was so common and so we’ll documented – it just seemed so darn common.

Based on this info, this crazy knowledge, I thought I’d be able to take my trusty camera – and just snap one picture of a pineapple on a door.  

No purpose, no reasoning, just weird excitement over people so publicly displaying their lifestyles for all to see (haha).

Either the internet is a lie or I was on the wrong ship – I searched, bottom to top, each deck one by one, searching for the elusive pineapple on a door (bonus points if upside down).

Not a single one appeared.

I searched for just a hint of a pineapple – part of a photo on a wall, on a magnet, on someone’s clothes, on a keychain – something, anything, just give me a weird public showing crazy people?!?!

It never arrived – and that’s okay.

Oftentimes we forgot how important the journey is versus the goal – while my wife knew I was insane and searching for stupidity to entertain myself, my son was just along for the ride to experience a new place, a new adventure.

We found hidden rooms, pathways, quiet areas under the bridge which no one else ever seemed to find (except one crazy person), made fun of drunk people walking the ship, sang along to silly songs, watched movies under the stars, and much, much, much more.

The point though, to be concise, was that this was never about the pineapple – it was about the “search” for it and what came along with that.

We don’t go to a movie to see the end, we don’t go to a concert to hear the last note, we don’t go on a road trip just to see the last mile (well, okay, maybe some do – I like to drive) – we go to enjoy the journey.

Every twist and turn that happens to the characters in the movie, every note of that song played on stage, every twist of the throttle while driving down the road – those, those amazing pieces, they make up the journey of our lives.

We all have this mindset that our lives are like first drafts; we’re taking in the opinions of others, their judgements on our decisions, letting it all affect how our lives play out – those ideas will totally take away the joy from those moments and journeys.

Don’t let the world take away the memories; don’t let the world turn down the song, don’t let the notes be reduced – chase the joy, chase the happiness, chase what you love.

So while I’m (very) late on the whole “new year, new me” style posting, and this isn’t meant to be that (more just a reminder to live), I do want to cover some goals.

Much like my wife does with her social stories, I look back at writings, see what has changed, what was accomplished, and like to be reminded of what I set out to do (both personally and professionally).

• I want to spend more time with my kiddo, playing Magic the Gathering, Warhammer, Pokemon, Roblox, and more just so he always remembers the fun times with his dad.
• I want to be here for my wife more; support her dreams and ambitions, push her like she pushes me, and see more of the world with a life filled with adventure.
• No matter my age, I want to play drums (for fun); I want to twirl the sticks in the air, play as hard as possible, and experience the creation of sound
• I want to fly through the sky, like a bird, bombing down the side of buildings, through trees, through mountains, and wherever else I can find to go FPV with drones.
• I want to sit in the stands of my favorite MLS team, cheering along with the fans and my family.
• I want to sit behind the lens of a camera, capturing all the moments, forever etched out in print.
• I want to hear the chains bang around as the disc hits the pin while playing disc golf again.
• I want to go outside, camp under the stars, make smores and hot chocolate staring off into the distance as we listen to the birds, the trees, the wind – just the unreal vibe of being grounded.
• I truly, and wholeheartedly, want to say goodbye to the echo chambers and instead say hello to the sun and moon.
• I want to study horology versus just collecting pieces; build my own watches, create my own designs, and truly learn all there is to know.
• I want to research and collect the most obscure collection of yo-yo’s (not for profit, purely for fun).
• I want to stand at the track, racing my little dirt cars (along with mini me) against highly skilled racers to help grow and learn.
• I want to sit behind the mic, recording episodes weekly, to have fun with the wife on a brand new podcast – purely for fun versus revenue.
• I want to sail the open seas, pina colada in hand, and just float away to a calm and relaxing environment (check this one off the list).
• I want to become more healthy, chase after doing a gun run, focus on living healthy, removing the toxins, and focusing on being here for the long haul.
• I want mindfulness; daily meditation and yoga alongside health and exercise changes.
• A focus on technology more (AI specifically), but also – less; higher degree of focus WHEN working, less focus when NOT working (to complete all other items).
• I want to sit behind the yoke of a small Cessna, flying over town, experiencing what it feels like to be a pilot.
• I want to write – constantly – to help myself learn, to help others, and to build a community (whether tech, or life in general).
• I want to build more for clients, I want to build more for myself, I want to grow an open source REAL project, and I want to see what it’s like to be more than an agency developer again.
• I want to do it all.

Life is too short to sit behind a keyboard, stressing over imposter syndrome, AI taking over the world, miffed at life, or [insert some other reason here].

We’re here for a millisecond – a small fraction of time – and if we don’t enjoy it, who will?

I’ve missed out on a lot over the years – due to fear, anxiety, hurt, and other excuses but you know what?

While I didn’t find the pineapple – I found clarity.